- Mrs. Nicklebee is not a natural redhead.
- Mr. Nicklebee isn’t either.
- Dub does not play the trombone.
- Neither does Homer.
- Neither does the Other Guy.
- The Nicklebees don’t own sissy dogs but still respect those who do.
- The Nicklebees don’t respect public figures or their wives who suffer from diarrhea of the mouth.
- Mr. Nicklebee can make his own peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
- Mr. and Mrs. Nicklebee agree that to “study hard and get smart” has little bearing on a person’s actual intelligence, though the Nicklebees believe that learning is very important.
- Mr. and Mrs. Nickelbee, the Other Guy, Homer and Dub agree that Napolean Dynamite was the most ridiculous movie ever made. That they have actually seen.
- Mrs. Nicklebee and Noah, the greatest dog alive, share a birthday.
- Noah is not a natural redhead either.
- Mrs. Nicklebee’s Great Grandfather was a professional baseball player.
- The Nicklebees watch professional baseball.
- Certain flaws in the Nicklebee tv cause the Detroit Tigers to occasionally appear to be natural redheads.
- We are not professional photographers.
- We are photo hogs.
- We have cameras.
- Automatic Everything cameras are not fool proof.
- The Nicklebees prove that regularly.
- Noah and Heidi are not brother and sister; they just look alike.
- Noah is the greatest dog on earth.
- Heidi is not the greatest dog on earth but she’s getting there. She is a sweet baby girl.
- All of the Nicklebee kids, parents, grandparents and great grandparents were born in the midwestern U.S.
- Mrs. Nicklebee’s childhood bestfriend lived just over the fence from Mrs. Nicklebee when they were children.
- When Mrs. Nicklebee was about 4 or 5, she was allowed to ride her tricycle to her Grandmother’s house.
- Mrs. Nicklebee would allow the Nicklebee children to ride their bikes to Grandma’s house at the age of 4 or 5 over her cold, dead, maggot infested carcass.
- Mrs. Nicklebee is taller than Debbie Reynolds but shorter than Julie Andrews.
- Homer is taller than Mrs. Nicklebee by a hair’s breadth.
- Dub and the Other Guy aren’t.
You don’t know me, but I had to comment on your factoids. Thanks for the best laugh I’ve had in days. You’re some kind of funny.
Btw, found you by way of Karen Joy at ‘onlysometimesclever.wordpress.com’…just so youll know I’m not scary.
You have inspired me to list my own factoids, there, Mrs. N!
Your eternal copycatter,
Jooleee
“sissy dogs” HAHAHAHA!! My dh calls them rodents. I’m a recovering rodent lover. I adore our Staffordshire Bull Terrier (actually, I adored the one that died
more than our current too-puppyish one), which is a good compromise, I think. Small/Medium, but NOT rodent-like.
Sissy dogs must be the small ones which look like a mop with no handle right. Dogs do freak me a bit close up but yours look really lovely.
Love the factoids, love the fact you used the word factoids, too. I’m also with you on the “don’t confuse a good education with a brain” viewpoint!
Cheers
BC
Sweary,
Sissy dogs are dogs that are too ornamental to be of any practical use.
You’ve got to come for a visit and meet Noah and Heidi when Heidi gets older and stops standing up on guests. *sigh* That girl! You’ll feel much better about dogs close up. Noah’s such a docile heifer around his friends. You’d love him.
I won’t admit to the fact that I had to look “factoids” up in the dictionary to make sure the usage was appropriate.
It means a lot to me that you, a true Englishwoman, appreciated that.
Melissa,
Thanks! I thought I’d better reply here because the comments were disabled on your blog. Nice site, btw!
Karen Joy,
I know what you mean about the younger one not quite measuring up. That used to be Noah but now he’s the greatest. Eventually they come into their own, though, and help ease the sting of the loss of the more beloved pet.
HeyJooleeeBaybeee,
Your next “I don’t know what else to write about” blogging assignment is to create a factoid list.
I too used to have a prejudice against sissy dogs, which for me just meant small dogs. But then I got some myself–well, not really sissy dogs, one of the things I like about Shibas is they’re relatively small but still definitely dogs. But one of my Shibas was small for the breed, and I just loved her, feisty little girl that she was.
I also have a miniature poodle, and I just gotta say–everyone should have a little poodle in their life. Just, please, don’t give them that god-awful clip, or dress them up. My poor guy looks pretty scroggly most of the time, because he got stuck with me and I rarely groom him properly. I call him my Wild Poodle of the High Rockies, or the Great Northwest, or the Central Coast, or wherever we happen to be.
Anyway–I think sissy dogs are created (by their owners), not born, usually.
I’m so glad that you don’t do those unnatural doggy dos. That’s just wrong! lol That was the first thing I noticed about the fluffy dog in one of your pictures.
I think you’re right about sissy dogs being created by their owners. My in-laws have a Bichon and he definitely handles himself like a real dog around my dogs.
I told my husband that after having Sammy visit, I wouldn’t mind having our own little foofy dog like him.